MOVING ON — melancholically — BECOMING NEW

We are born and then we die. I know that all things come to an end on this earth.

Freshman year at the university in 2015, I was assigned to random roommates. I loved those two guys and they became brothers. We lived together until May 2019 when Kashif departed for law school at FAMU.

Now, it’s almost May 2020 and I’m departing. Richard is remaining at PBA for the continuation of pharmacy school but it’s my turn to go.

I work full-time in Boca Raton, FL and currently I’ve been driving up to an hour each morning.

It’s been good but there isn’t much leftover time.

I wake up at 6:30 or 5:30 if I go to the gym and then leave the house before 8:00.

By the time I leave work it’s 4:45 if I have class or after 6:00 if I don’t. A few nights a week right now I’m available after 7:00 while other days I have Bible study, and of course, my now online classes.

There is not that much time in a day left over really.

And I’m writing 2 of these pieces for each week, reading a book every other week and completing an audiobook every week.

Occasionally, I like a social life.

I want to create more time that I can spend on other things. Leaving the known and venturing into the unknown is one of the best ways that I can see myself doing that.

As I said, I work in Boca Raton. The housing prices down here in South Florida are fairly high. It’s nearly impossible to get into a studio or 1 bedroom for under $1000 a month.

That’s where upgrading to a 2 bedroom can be entirely beneficial. Those are found for less than $1700 in a few spots which means close to $2000 of savings in a year’s time.

I’m not sure if I’m ready or looking forward to something like this.

I’ve found myself feeling more and more uncertain. But at the same time, I’ve found myself relying more and more on God.

Someone said recently after I shared some history about myself that most people don’t know — you don’t always give off that type of vulnerability, you seem guarded.

I was a little bit caught off guard from that comment.

But at the same time, I spend the majority of my time listening to others and sharing things that could and should benefit them rather than myself.

Sometimes though, I know that there is more to why God created me. I know that who I am becoming can be and needs to be enhanced and accelerated. It’s time to focus on what matters most.

It’s time.

“All I can be is me; I cannot be whomever I want to be. Who the Creator made us to be is who we are, that’s who we can be. God is an intentional craftsman, we were meticulously designed by God.” — Jordan Raynor

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